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Macgyver Quotes
Season 1 "Hey, I want the knife back, okay?" MacGyver - Pilot Pilot: What's supposed to become of that? MacGyver: A modest rocket-drive. "Please say you only came to see me and not to bring bad news, too!" MacGyver - Pilot Colson: I'm afraid you'll need a lot more, than you can pack in your bag to your aim down there. MacGyver: I didn't plan to carry big equipment. The bag is for things I find on the way. Barbara: I know, maybe it's not the right moment to ask, but what's your name anyway? MacGyver: "MacGyver" Barbara: That's good name. MacGyver: Chocolate! Do you want some, too? Barbara: No, thank you! How can you get an appetite for chocolate now, have you forgotten that our chances of getting out of here alive.... MacGyver: I know our chances very well, but I don't think a little additional energy will hurt, - who knows, what's expecting us. "For us it seems to be milk-chocolate, but for the acid it will be C12+H22+O11. The acid reacts with the sugar, it will come into beeing carbon and a sticky, tough residue, this should be good enough to close the rip. Temporarily at least." MacGyver - Pilot Barbara: Don't tell me you are one of those guys who can make a chewing gum into a bomb. MacGyver: Good idea, if you have some...? Barbara: I would like to kiss you, MacGyver! But thinking about my cold.... MacGyver: What's a little cold amongst friends.... "You may not believe this, but there have been times when I've had a lot more fun in the back seat of a car." MacGyver - Golden Triangle "Typical. Just when you're getting ahead, someone changes the odds." MacGyver - Pegasus "I'm with you pal, I hate heights." MacGyver - Pegasus "I'm in the market for a Swiss Army Knife." MacGyver - Thief of Budapest "Some people are scared of anybody who runs free." MacGyver - Thief of Budapest "The great thing about a map, it get you in and out to places in alot different ways." MacGyver - Gauntlet "A good map always takes you where you want to go!" MacGyver - Gauntlet "I've been here and there, in this and that place. But actually I wanted to find out, how the world works, I wanted to meet people, find out how different they are and yet always the same!" MacGyver - Gauntlet "You're a very unexpected man, MacGyver. You keep me off balance." Kate Connelly - The Gauntlet Kate: And how do we make a fire now? Do we wait for a lightning, or do we rub stiggs MacGyver: I thought about using a match. "I fixed it...MacGyver style." Kate - The Gauntlet "I'm harmless." MacGyver - The Gauntlet "Bond, James Bond." MacGyver - The Heist "Brace yourself. This could be fun." MacGyver - The Heist "I've found from past experiences that the tighter your plan, the more likely you are to run into something unpredictable." MacGyver - The Heist "That's when I usually get a call; when someone's in trouble and needs some rescuing." MacGyver - Whitewater "I think I should get an unlisted phone number." MacGyver - Trumbo's World "I don't waste time on the impossible." Trumbo - Trumbo's World "I don't know how good ants are at swimmin', but I'd be willing to bet that a good fire'd get their attention." MacGyver - Trumbo's World "You got that one Trumbo. The trouble is a couple billion of his relatives are coming to the funeral." MacGyver - Trumbo's World "I'm not perfect... yet." MacGyver - Last Stand "I'll wish for you. You wish for me." MacGyver - Last Stand "You gotta be careful what you wish for - it just might come true." MacGyver - Last Stand This road would definitely be an E ride at Disneyland." MacGyver - Hellfire "I do what I do the way I do it." MacGyver - The Prodigal "You're the one who used to tell me that you don't fish for fish, you fish for fishing." MacGyver - Target MacGyver "What a beautiful part of the world. It has everything but people." MacGyver - Target MacGyver "Like the magician said, a little misdirection never hurt." MacGyver - Nightmares "That's the handymanside of MacGyver. He likes to make clever little things out of odd bits." Quail - Deathlock Season 2 "Making waves already, Mr. MacGyver?" Dr. Jill Ludlum - The Human Factor "30,000 watts of laser is a whole lot more than a peck on the cheek." Dr. Jill Ludlum - The Human Factor "I'd hate to be the one that had to do the floors around here." MacGyver - The Human Factor "Aw c'mon, where's your sense of adventure?" MacGyver - The Human Factor "Put twelve guys carrying sticks in an enclosed area and sooner or later... men will be boys." MacGyver - The Eraser "Linda, sweetheart, the car will go now, I suggest you go with it." MacGyver - The Eraser "I lived by the beach when I was a kid. Well, it really wasn't a beach, it was a drainage ditch." Jimmy Kendall - The Eraser "Look, if this works, it'll keep us from gettin' caught. If it doesn't, it'll keep us from gettin' old." MacGyver - The Eraser "You know, for a smart guy you're not too bright, are ya." MacGyver - The Eraser "I didn't think you'd go in for whipped bean curd." MacGyver - The Eraser "Take my advice, stay young." Jimmy Kendall - The Eraser "He shoots, scores, and wins!" MacGyver - The Eraser "Dreams are important, otherwise sleep is just eight hours of nothing." Jimmy Kendall - The Eraser "You don't go to people with your problems, you come to your friends." MacGyver - Twice Stung "Old Minnesota wisdom; if you don't wanna be touched, look downright untouchable." MacGyver - The Wish Child "Teenage party; what ever happened to spin the bottle?" MacGyver - The Wish child "If you could do what you just did, you could land this thing on the moon." Ramon - Final Approach "Tricks o' me trade ol' boy, tricks o' me trade!" Jack Dalton - Jack of Lies "So what's the deal? Papa Thornton say you can come out and play, or what?" Jack Dalton - Jack of Lies "Jack operates a lot on faith." MacGyver - Jack of Lies "What's he doing?" "I haven't got a clue, but I'm used to it." Pete & Sister Margaret - The Road Not Taken "Still doing it, huh? Making things out of thin air?" Deborah - The Road Not Taken "Well, when it comes down to me against a situation, I don't like the situation to win." MacGyver - The Road Not Taken "I'm good with broken down machinery; it's the only kind I've ever had." Sister Margaret - The Road Not Taken "They say drowning men see their lives flash before them - falling men do, too." MacGyver - Eagles "The only arguments I ever had with my mother were about bedtime. I finally had to let her stay up until ten." MacGyver - Eagles "This isn't a movie, they're using real bullets!!" MacGyver - Three for the Road "A paperclip can be a wonderous thing. More times than I can remember, one of these has gotten me out of a tight spot." MacGyver - Three for the Road "A good relationship is alot like a car. If you want it to work smoothly, you gotta put alot of work into it, and have the right tools." MacGyver - Three for the Road "That's easy for you to say, you're not running on my knees!" Harry - Phoenix Under Seige "Don't be modest. Everybody knows MacGyver's MacGyver." Victoria - Phoenix Under Seige "It's funny how when you want time to move along, it never does - but when you're running out of time, it disappears much too soon." MacGyver - Phoenix Under Seige "When I was a kid, I used to have nightmares, and you used to tell me that being scared's a lot worse when you're all alone." MacGyver - Phoenix Under Siege "We heard an explosion, that's all! MacGyver's damn hard to kill." Pete - Family Matter If life in America is like this, who needs movies." Yuri "Biff" Dimitri - Soft Touch "I think if you try hard enough and make the best of a situation, the situation won't get the best of you." MacGyver - Birth Day "You guys are missing out on a good deal if you kill me. See, I'm kind of an expert with just about everything." MacGyver - Pirates "Boy, don't you ever dust this place?" "Twice a year, like clockwork." Pete & MacGyver - Out In The Cold "I cannot eat 1200 beans that have been batter beyond recognition." Pete - Out in the Cold "Skiing's fun. Avalanches are dangerous." MacGyver - Out in the Cold "Don't you think six feet under is taking 'laying low' a little far?" MacGyver - Dalton, Jack of Spies "That's it? That's spy talk? Some science." MacGyver - Dalton, Jack of Spies "That lady is a top level, world class assassin named Murdoc." Pete - Partners "I know that look; I've never been able to figure out how your mind works, but I know when it works." Pete - Partners "He's got honesty the way some people have diseases... incurable." Jack - Partners "Egg whites are good for a lot of things; lemon merangue pie, angel food cake, and clogging up radiators." MacGyver - Bushmaster "Sometimes I just hate it when I'm right." MacGyver - Bushmaster "Birthday blues, I've seen it before. What's the meaning of life? What's the grand plan? What's to drink?" Jack - Friends "Just goes to show ya, a good map will always get you where you want to go." "Yeah, provided you wanna get there in the first place." Harry & MacGyver - Friends "For the past seven years I have done nothing but travel around the world getting shot up, locked up, blown up... and all I have to show for it are a couple of empty rolls of duct tape." MacGyver - Friends "When I was a kid, my grandfather used to say to me that a fella's life wasn't worth mentioning if he hadn't shared it with some folks along the way." MacGyver giving his birthday speech - Friends "He can fix anything. He can fix a computer with a hairpin and a piece of duct tape." Pete - DOA: MacGyver "What, one of her deals? That's not a favor, that's a human sacrifice!" MacGyver - For Love Or Money Season 3 "I don't give a rat's pajamas about the money!" MacGyver - Jack in the Box "That's Murdoc. He's not your normal professional killer." MacGyver - The Widowmaker "Funny thing about running is that you always end up taking yourself with you." Pete - The Widowmaker "Nothing worse than a physicist stupefied by the obvious." Professor Ryman - Hell Week "You're the one who has the Nobel prize; you figure it out." Janet - Hell Week "Anybody who sounds like this should be home in bed." MacGyver with a cold - Blow Out "Can't talk you into a haircut, can I?" Pete - The Negotiator "A man should not live under the same sky as his father's murderers." Luke - Murderer's Sky "You're very thick-headed, you know that?" "You know something? You're right." Jimmy and Mac - Back from the Dead Season 4 "Well that would sound a lot more convincing if you weren't holding a human skull." Penny Parker - The Secret of Parker House "I mean crazy... loopy as a loon." Sylvia - Secret of Parker House "It never stops there. You got a gun, things happen. People die." MacGyver - Blood Brothers "Coming home is like reaching into a grab bag of memories. Some of them good, some of them not so good." MacGyver - Blood Brothers "My jeep went over a cliff. I died, and went to Thanksgiving." MacGyver - The Outsiders "I need a plane, I need a pilot. I need you, Jack." MacGyver - On A Wing And A Prayer "Your slipknot's not slipping!" MacGyver - On a Wing and a Prayer "Hell of a way to go, huh? I always thought I'd drop dead at my desk, or on the 9th tee." Pete - On A Wing And A Prayer "If you let yourself be afraid of dying, you're just gonna end up being afraid of living." Charlie - Collision Course "Actually, I've seen you do a lot more, with a lot less." Pete - Collision Course "I call it an obstacle course. Some of the others call it MacGyverland." MacGyver - The Survivors "Does this count towards my recertification, or do I have to go back to MacGyverland?" Pete - The Survivors "That one guy in there could put frost on a sunny day." MacGyver - Deadly Dreams "To solve his deadly riddle, you'll have to be intellectually superior, exceptionally persistent, and possess an abundance of ingenuity. Are you all of these things, Mr. MacGyver?" Zito - Deadly Dreams "Mothers, Sometimes they're more trouble than they're worth, ya know?" Jack - Ma Dalton "I was a little slow coming out of the esophagus." Penny - Cleo Rocks "Trust is such a worthless commodity. Now security... that's priceless." Papion - Fraternity of Thieves "A parent can only take so much responsibility." MacGyver - Fraternity of Thieves "The karma of any number that's not divisble by 2 or 5 just puts us into a cosmic tailspin, totally." MacGyver - The Battle Of Tommy Giordano "The wrong number really messes with my polarity." Mary Ruth Giordano - The Battle of Tommy Giordano "Every action has a reaction...you've got to believe that." MacGyver - The Challenge "Just goes to show you, you can't judge a book by it's color." MacGyver - The Challenge "Never could say no to a stray, could you MacGyver." Cynthia - Runners "I know about people who live on houseboats. They like to drift around." Crystal - Runners "That is what I always admired about you, how you never let go of something worthwhile." Natalie to MacGyver - Gold Rush "I think you shouldn't go Russian on me just yet. You know, heroic, fatalistic... Russian." MacGyver - Gold Rush "You tell me, what's a convict look like?" Liz - The Invisible Killer "Wow, and I thought my whistle was clever." Liz - The Invisible Killer "Dream nothin'; that was one-hundred-fifty proof nightmare." Jack Dalton - Brainwashed "From the bottom of my heart I salute you." Trigger words - Brainwashed "It was just me and the salmon, like a dream come true." Pete - Brainwashed "Why let a little thing like this ruin a perfectly good vacation." MacGyver - Easy Target "You gentlemen know how these work - pull the pin, release the handle and it explodes. Crude, but effective." Johnathan - Easy Target "Most people go out and work for a living instead of dragging their friends from one disaster to another." MacGyver - Unfinished Business "This is the thanks I get for cutting my friends in on a golden opportunity. Imagine my chagrin." Jack Dalton - Unfinished Business Season 5 "It's been waiting 800 years, I don't think another day is gonna matter." MacGyver - Legend Of The Holy Rose "If you want to get MacGyver's help, first you have to get his full and undivided attention." Zoe - Legend Of The Holy Rose "Thats the ugliest dang dog I've ever seen" Frank Colton - Black Corsage "Everybody used to say the world was flat, too." MacGyver - Cease Fire "You can do anything you wanna do if you put your mind to it." MacGyver - Cease Fire "My mother always taught me never to carry a picture of Andrew Jackson in my wallet." Jessie Colton - Second Chance "Almost as good as me; and deadly as she is beautiful." Murdoc - Halloween Knights "Murdoc, if this is another one of your games, let's get on with it." MacGyver - Halloween Knights "You know I'm not real big on doing favors for professional killers." MacGyver - Halloween Knights "Happy Halloween, MacGyver. Trick or Treat." Murdoc - Halloween Knights "I'm so sorry about your friend. He must have been a very special person." Ashton - Halloween Knights "Greetings from the grave, MacGyver." Murdoc - Halloween Knights "I may be reformed, but I'm not crazy." Murdoc - Halloween Knights "Don't worry, MacGyver, you'll see me again. Just keep looking over your shoulder." Murdoc - Halloween Knights "Y'know, MacGyver, that's why you're so hard to beat. Nobody knows what you're going to do next, including you." Murdoc - Halloween Knights "It's perfectly harmless, trust me." Murdoc - Halloween Knights "You're gonna have to trust me on this." MacGyver - Children of Light "Changing your name you can do - but changing who you are, this you can never do." Sam - Ten Percent Solution "This Christmas stuff gets a little sappy after awhile." MacGyver - The Madonna "I think Santa's giving me a hernia for Christmas." Pete - The Madonna "Trust me. I know about this stuff." MacGyver - The Madonna "Oh boy, you call yourself a Santa?" "No, I call myself employed." Pete & the Charity Santa - The Madonna "Love. It sure does affect productivity." Pete - Deep Cover "Man, I'm so hungry I could almost eat health food." Wilt - The Lost Amadeus "Love is not some bill to be payed on holidays and weekends, Bud. You wanna show someone you care, you do it when they're not around, like living up to the example they set." Harry - Passages "Death's not so scary. I don't think it's the end of anything. It's just another step along the way." MacGyver - Passages Season 6 "For a man who doesn't like violence, you certainly know alot about it." R.T. Hines - Tough Boys "Bold and nosy. I'm famous for that." MacGyver - Tough Boys "Discipline's only a crime when it's enforced by somebody with the sensitivity and judgment of a rock." MacGyver - Tough Boys "I'm not gonna take it in the back, and I'm not gonna take it laying down, so you're just gonna have to shoot me face to face! I can't believe I said that..." MacGyver - Humanity "Human nature. I do something nice for you, you do something nice for me, like not kill me. Next thing you know, we're friends." MacGyver - Humanity "If I didn't get you turned around the venom would've gone straight to your heart, assuming you have one." MacGyver - Humanity "Don't thank me. I was born a warm and wonderful human being." Pete - The Gun "A thousand down, only a hundred million to go." MacGyver - The Gun "Just setting up a program here, it's uh, very complicated stuff." MacGyver - The Wall "You can't outsmart computer imaging." Pete - The Wall "I'm an expert on the subject. One day I'll educate you. A lesson in evil, you might say." Dr. Zito - Lesson in Evil "Evil cannot be beaten simply by confronting it." Zito - Lesson in Evil "Evil never plays fair. That's why it will always win." Zito - Lesson in Evil "It was all part of Harry's lesson; that success isn't a matter of how much you've got, its how well you live." MacGyver - Harry's Will "Why couldn't he have just died like everybody else? No, not Harry - he's too stubborn." Cody - Harry's Will "You carry secrets, each of you; wounds on your souls. The wounds will only heal if you trust in each other." Dr. Destiny - MacGyver's Women "Like cowboys, who are faithful to their horse, but not with a woman." Maria - MacGyver's Women "I've got something to say about all of this.... and, I'm going to bed." MacGyver - MacGyver's Women "Someday I'll learn to drive on the Interstate." MacGyver - Bitter Harvest "Sounds like it could mean paying jobs for these folks - I think that's more important than chasing after little green men, don't you?" Sheriff - The Visitor "Ya gotta wonder." MacGyver - The Visitor "You're both travelling on the same path, and she seems to know the road!" Mama Colton - Squeeze Play "There's some things it's just not right to put a price on." Novus Riley - Squeeze Play "What they told us about Americans before glastnost, about how all of you are selfish monsters, is totally bogus." Nikolai - Jerico Games "I'm not trying to be mysterious about it, it's just that what I do is tough to explain." MacGyver - Jerico Games "Somehow, in the corner of my mind as I was going down, I knew you'd show up. You're always on time." Willis - The Wasteland Phoenix is a public interest foundation; it sticks it's nose in all kinds of places." Laura - The Wasteland "It is the universal truth; he who has the gun asks the questions." Nicholas Von Leer - The Eye Of Osiris "Well maybe if you weren't such a dragon lady you'd have a partner to do those things for you." Dent - High Control "Well maybe if there weren't so many sociopaths like you running around, we could afford partners." Montana - High Control "There are no great things to accomplish in this life, just small things done with great love." Rachel quoting Fr. Jim - There But For The Grace "The only difference between you and me is a little bit of luck." MacGyver - There But For The Grace "Pete, I'll be your eyes, you be my hands." MacGyver - Blind Faith "I remember one day, we spent a whole morning just looking at a rainbow, yeah... just looking." Pete - Blind Faith "I have a terrific idea, why don't you just slam a door on their leg. That ought to get their attention." Faith - Faith, Hope & Charity "It's just two old ladies and a gimp!" Gorman - Faith, Hope, and Charity "I don't understand you, Leo. You keep saying how you like the air up here. Why do you spoil it with those cancer sticks?" Faith - Faith, Hope & Charity "Goodbye, MacGyver. Rest in pieces!" Murdoc - Strictly Business "Why don't you say your prayers now. That is, if you can remember any." Murdoc - Strictly Business "If I had some duct tape, I could fix that." Murdoc - Strictly Business "Better death through chemistry, that's what I always say." Murdoc - Strictly Business "The death of MacGyver, scene one, Action." Murdoc - Strictly Business "One man's terrorist is another man's patriot." Whitecloud - Trail of Tears "There are many things your world could learn from ours." Standing Wolf - Trail of Tears "MacGyver, we are friends we've been friends, but you have never really needed me." Pete - Hind Sight "Yeah, sure. You come up with the brains and I provide the paychecks." Pete - Hind Sight Season 7 "It appears that the military look is in. Of course, I have more accessories." Murdoc - Obsessed "Walk in love, walk in service, and you will walk in honor, my beloved son, Angus." Ian M'Iver - Good Knight, MacGyver "Only a fool is sure of anything, a wise man keeps on guessing." MacGyver quoting Harry - The Stringer |
