English
Nederlands
2006-01-29
Thirty-first Column
Tonight my thirty-first column was broadcast in Gendertalk #545.
You can find the complete program in the Gendertalk archive.
Or you can find just my column at:
http://eveliensnel.com/audio/REACT01.mp3
A full transcript of the text is below:
Reactions
I have recieved lots of reactions to my interview in the newspaper; both positive and negative. Positive reactions are pleasing of course, but negative ones are more useful, because those can help me to learn something.
People who know both me and my spouse often reacted saying: "Yes that is your view on the story." At first I didn't understand them. What other view should have been in the article? It was about me, so it is only natural that it reflects my view.
My spouse, Julia, made it very clear to me what was wrong with the article: There is not a word in it that speaks about Julia's role in all this. Not a word of recognition for what she has had to endure and how she supported me all those years. And that is true. I am sorry about that.
And there was another negative reaction. This one was from a transsexual woman I often meet at support group meetings. She was not pleased at all by the way the article pictures me as someone who is always busy with herself, her body and her looks. She also said the article showed that I was dealing with my environment in an opportunistic way and ditched my spouse without showing any emotions.
Of course you and I know that this is not the way it went. In my columns I have mentioned several times how many doubts and emotions were involved with our seperation. But it is true that I am very busy with myself and with my body. And my looks are important to me as far as they affect my passability as a woman.
Anyway, her father-in-law had read the article, put the newspaper down and said, referring to his transsexual child-in-law: "This person is no longer welcome in my house. If this is what transsexuals are like, I now know what I can expect." He doesn't want such selfish ego-trippers in the family.
Is that truly the picture of a transsexual I have given with my interview? Or are these the prejudices this guy had all the time and was he looking for a confirmation of those in my interview? I think it is a crying shame that he would sooner believe a newpaper article about someone he never met than his own child-in-law!
But I am very sorry to hear my interview had such a dramatic impact on people's personal lives. I am not a scientist, I am not an activist. It has never been my intention to give a carefully balanced and politically correct statement about transsexuals in general.
All I have done is tell the story of my life. The story of how someone can overcome a life full of misery and grow towards a happy life once she manages to admit to her deepest feelings and starts to act upon those. I thought I was doing a positive thing for acceptance of transsexuals in our society. And I hoped I was showing others that transition is possible. As a matter of fact I still think I did!
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You can find the complete program in the Gendertalk archive.
Or you can find just my column at:
http://eveliensnel.com/audio/REACT01.mp3
A full transcript of the text is below:
I have recieved lots of reactions to my interview in the newspaper; both positive and negative. Positive reactions are pleasing of course, but negative ones are more useful, because those can help me to learn something.
People who know both me and my spouse often reacted saying: "Yes that is your view on the story." At first I didn't understand them. What other view should have been in the article? It was about me, so it is only natural that it reflects my view.
My spouse, Julia, made it very clear to me what was wrong with the article: There is not a word in it that speaks about Julia's role in all this. Not a word of recognition for what she has had to endure and how she supported me all those years. And that is true. I am sorry about that.
And there was another negative reaction. This one was from a transsexual woman I often meet at support group meetings. She was not pleased at all by the way the article pictures me as someone who is always busy with herself, her body and her looks. She also said the article showed that I was dealing with my environment in an opportunistic way and ditched my spouse without showing any emotions.
Of course you and I know that this is not the way it went. In my columns I have mentioned several times how many doubts and emotions were involved with our seperation. But it is true that I am very busy with myself and with my body. And my looks are important to me as far as they affect my passability as a woman.
Anyway, her father-in-law had read the article, put the newspaper down and said, referring to his transsexual child-in-law: "This person is no longer welcome in my house. If this is what transsexuals are like, I now know what I can expect." He doesn't want such selfish ego-trippers in the family.
Is that truly the picture of a transsexual I have given with my interview? Or are these the prejudices this guy had all the time and was he looking for a confirmation of those in my interview? I think it is a crying shame that he would sooner believe a newpaper article about someone he never met than his own child-in-law!
But I am very sorry to hear my interview had such a dramatic impact on people's personal lives. I am not a scientist, I am not an activist. It has never been my intention to give a carefully balanced and politically correct statement about transsexuals in general.
All I have done is tell the story of my life. The story of how someone can overcome a life full of misery and grow towards a happy life once she manages to admit to her deepest feelings and starts to act upon those. I thought I was doing a positive thing for acceptance of transsexuals in our society. And I hoped I was showing others that transition is possible. As a matter of fact I still think I did!
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