All I Need Is Me
By Angel

Kate Johnson stared at the padd before her in disbelief. Divorce papers? Bust she and Mark had a good marriage. They were such great friends, could talk about anything, had known each other for ages. He never mentioned divorce, why would he want a divorce? Surely, there must be some mistake. She shook her head and put the padd aside. She and Mark would laugh about this later, she thought.

There had been no mistake. He no longer loved her he said. Well, he still loved her but not like that. Not like he loved her, the new woman in his life. She was working for him as a research assistant. He had mentioned her many times before, talked about how brilliant she was. Kate had obviously been suffering from some kind of delusional deformity not having seen the writing on the wall. She had even met her once, this girl. A stunning blonde, legs 'til eternity and a chest, well, she couldn't blame Mark for being attracted to her.
But still, giving up his marriage for this Annika Hansen seemed a little extreme. Couldn't he just have an affair with her or something. But is was more than a fling he said. With Annika he had found that passion that he and Kate had never had. Not that he meant to hurt her even more he said but he was beginning to realize that maybe they should never have gotten married at all.

She had stared at him in disbelief much like she had been staring at the fateful padd earlier that day. Refusing to comprehend what she was hearing. Surely there must be some mistake... Kate rubbed her head in confusion. One minute she had been arguing with Mark, next thing she knew she was standing on this... what? It looked suspiciously like the bridge of Voyager. And that young man that was staring at her, wasn't that? Tom Paris? What was he doing in a Starfleet uniform?

"Captain?" he asked uncertainly, "are you all right? Where's your uniform? What happened to your hair?"

"I don't know," she said as she looked around the bridge. Wasn't that Tuvok? And Harry Kim, looking considerably better than he had when she had last seen him. She didn't recognize the burly man with the tattoo or the half-Klingon girl that were staring at her.

"Computer," the tattood man said, "locate Captain Janeway."

"Captain Janeway is in her Ready Room." The computer responded crisply.

The man hit his commbadge. "Captain to the bridge!"

Five seconds later Kate was face to face with a version of herself a couple of years ago. With shorter hair. Maybe it was time she started looking for some answers.

"Who the hell are you?" her counterpoint asked.

"Commodore Johnson, Starfleet Command," she answered. "Where am I?"

"U.S.S. Voyager, Delta Quadrant, 50.000 lightyears away from Starfleet Command. It seems we have a little mystery on our hands."

Kate nodded. The Captain asked her to join her in her Ready Room, called for the Doctor, told Kate to take a seat. "I'm Kathryn Janeway," she said, "but then I suspect, so are you. Johnson eh? So you and Mark got married?"

"Yes. You did not?"

"We never had the chance." she said.

Lucky you, Kate thought. She heard the hiss of the door behind her and noticed an EMH enter. The hologram stared at her, then turned to his Captain. "Doctor," she said, "I suspect this woman came to us from some sort of other universe. Is there any chance you can confirm that?" The EMH moved over her with an old fashioned scanning device. "She does appear to be slightly out of sync with us, but it's hard to tell what the cause of that would be without a thorough medical examination." he said.

"All right, Doctor, we'll look into that later." She turned back to Kate. "I'll have B'Elanna work on some way to get you back. Do you have any idea how you got here?"

"None," she answered "I was talking to Mark, then I was here. That's all I can tell you."

Kathryn nodded, got up. Kate followed her example. They walked back to the bridge where Kathryn gave some orders to the half-Klingon girl and told the burly commander she'd be in her quarters if anyone needed her. "I think you and I have some catching up to do." she told Kate with a smile. She seemed more at ease with herself than Kate ever remembered being. She also reminded her of much she missed being a Captain. They walked the hallways of Voyager toward the Captain's quarters and Kate was painfully aware of how much she missed this ship. Peculiar that it was still in service in this universe, but then a lot of things here seemed peculiar. What was it that her counterpart had said about being in the Delta Quadrant? And why did she have a holographic emitter in her Ready Room? She was suddenly aware that Kathryn was talking to her.

"What?" she asked.

"How is life in your universe? You seem to know your way around Voyager."

"My Voyager is no longer in service," she said, "I miss her though."

"As would I," Kathryn answered. "How did you get home from the Delta Quadrant?"

She opened the door to her quarters and gestured at the couch.

"I was never in the Delta Quadrant." Kate answered as she sat down.

"What about Voyager's first mission? The Maquis, the badlands, what happened?" Kathryn asked, seating herself next to Kate and uncorking a bottle of wine.

"We went on the mission, retrieved Tuvok. The Maquis ship got destroyed."

"So B'Elanna, Chakotay and the others, they got killed?" Kathryn seemed shocked, held the wine in the air, midway toward a glass.

"I have never heard of those people," Kate said uncertainly.

"Chakotay, my first officer, was the Captain of that ship." Kathryn said in a somewhat accusing tone. "And B'Elanna, my chief Engineer, was their engineer and commander. I would not have made it this far without their qualities, support and friendship. You have never met them?"

"No," Kate answered. Why was this Kathryn running a ship with a Maquis crew? "What happened on your Voyager's first mission?"

Kathryn told her amazing story. About how she and her ship got stuck in the Delta Quadrant after her courageous decision to destroy the array that could have taken them home. About how she had learned to cope with a half Maquis crew. About all the new races she had met, how she had conquered the Borg. About Seven of Nine, a human girl she had reclaimed from the Borg and in whom she obviously had more than a passing interest. And with each story Kate's admiration for her counterpart grew and more and more she started to realize that this woman was leading the life that she had wanted for herself.
She told Kate about the day they had finally managed to contact Starfleet and she had received a message from Mark saying he had married someone else.

"The irony of it all," Kate mumbled.

"What's that?" Kathryn asked.

"Mark just informed me he wants a divorce. He met some other girl, one of his research assistants, and was reminded of true passion. Something he claims we never had. I think you lived the better option, Kathryn."

"Maybe I did. Still, it wasn't easy." She sat silent for a while, stared out the window.

"But enough about me," Kathryn said. "Tell me about your life, about the Alpha Quadrant, about Mark. Tell me what my life would have been like if I hadn't made that fatal decision to destroy the array."

Kate flinched and had to fight to keep herself in check. She cleared her throat before she started talking. "After we had rescued Tuvok from the Maquis ship, Voyager was commissioned to fight in the Cardassian war. We lost a lot of people in that war, so many people I saw die... Those were a hard four years and afterward I was more than happy to settle down with Mark in a nice safe desk job as a commodore. That was a mistake however. Not a day goes by that I don't regret that decision. I need to be a Captain, I need to be in space, it's the only way I can be happy."

"So why don't you?"

"I don't know. I seem to have lost that spark somewhere along the way. The guts to do the stuff I want to do instead of sitting around waiting for things to happen. You still have it Kathryn, what happened to my spark?"

Kathryn moved closer to her on the couch and grabbed her hands. They sat silent, staring in each other's eyes.

"It's strange," Kathryn said, "how you can be so different and yet exactly the same."

"Must be the hair. Can't believe you cut it, I never dared."

"I was actually thinking about growing it out again."

"Don't. This is much better."

"The weird thing is," Kathryn continued, "I have never looked in the mirror and thought of myself as a particularly attractive woman. Average, at best. Yet when I look at you I can't help thinking about how gorgeous you are and wonder if I have been wrong about myself."

"I'd like to say you're better looking than I am, but I know I'd be lying. I understand your point, is what I'm trying to say."

Kathryn snickered. "We're an odd couple."

Her door chimed, she said enter and a gorgeous blonde stepped in. A little too familiar for Kate's liking.

"I'll be damned, if it isn't Annika Hansen. What are the odds."

The blonde arched her brow, which was decored by a Borg-like implant. "My designation is Seven of Nine," she said, "I do not remember being Annika Hansen."

Kathryn introduced them. "Seven, this is Kathryn Johnson, my counterpart from another universe. We don't know how she got here, but B'Elanna is working on a way to get her back to where she came from. Meanwhile, we're catching up on things. In this Kathryn's universe, Voyager never got lost in the Delta Quadrant."

"Nice to meet you, Seven," Kate responded. "And it's Kate actually, I never liked Kathryn."

Kathryn looked at her surprised. "I always hated it when people called me Kate," she said with a grin. "I noticed you recognized our Seven. Who is she in your universe?"

"Mark's new girlfriend." Kate responded.

Kathryn actually dropped her jaw. Clearly, she had not been expecting that. It was Seven of Nine who spoke. "Mark, the man your were engaged to marry?" she asked Kathryn, who nodded in response.

"In my universe, Mark just told me he wants a divorce so he can be with his new girlfriend, which is you, that is, your counterpart." Kate elaborated.

"You must introduce me to this Mark, when we get back to the Alpha Quadrant," Seven stated. Kathryn snickered. "Still working on that sense of humour, are you Seven?"

"I shall leave now, I did not realize you had company," Seven said with a nod toward Kathryn. Kathryn smiled warmly at her and escorted her out.

"Well," she said after Seven had left. "This is all very peculiar."

"It's ironic that you ended up with Annika here, instead of Mark."

"I wouldn't say I ended up with her per se," Kathryn responded, "and true irony would be for you to get back to your own time and steal Annika away from Mark."

"Indeed," Kate mused, "something to think about."

They sat back on the couch, Kathryn poured more wine. "What has become of Harry Kim?" she asked Kate.

"Ah, Harry Kim... He married that Libby girl and went down hill from there. She turned out to be some sort of nymphomaniac and screwed poor Harry around left and right. He couldn't handle it, started drinking and using drugs and what not. He got booted out of Starfleet, something his parents never got over. Last I heard he's in rehab, so I hope he pulls out all right."

"You still have it, you know." Kathryn said.

"Still have what?"

"That spark you talked about. It's still there, I can see it in your eyes. Come." She pulled Kate up and toward her bedroom where she positioned them in front of a large mirror.

"You see?"

"I see two exactly the same women, one of which I find attractive, the other not."

"I don't even know which mirror image is mine and which is yours," Kathryn grinned. She lowered her voice. "You realize that at some point you'll be going back and we'll never see each other again."

Kate nodded, turned her face toward Kathryn's. She could see the desire in her eyes, it was the same desire she felt growing in the pit of her stomach.

"Therefor this is very..."

"Safe."

"Indeed."

Kate pressed her lips against Kathryn's who may look the same, but felt so very different. Smelled different, sounded different.

Not before long they were ripping each other's clothes off and falling on the bed. "I know exactly what you want," Kate whispered.

"I bet you do," Kathryn grunted in response, then let out a cry as Kate closed her teeth around her delicate nipples.

She pulled Kathryn's arms above her head with her left hand and pinned them down on the bed. With her right hand she scratched circles around Kathryn's belly button before placing her hand over her hot center. She looked up at Kathryn's face to see her expression when she slowly opened her folds and slid her fingers inside. Kathryn moaned and looked back at Kate. And in that moment everything became clear to her. She knew why she was here and she knew exactly what to do when she got back. And Kathryn knew as well, she could read it in her eyes before they closed tight while her orgasm hit her.

Kathryn's body relaxed under her. "This sure was the ultimate act of masturbation," she grinned.

"So technically, it wouldn't even be cheating." Kate responded.

"Cheating on who?" Kathryn asked as she flipped Kate on her back and positioned herself between her legs. "That two-timing Mark? He doesn't even know how to make you come."

Kate knew all too well how true that was. "Yes!" she screamed when Kathryn's tongue darted over her clit, as her fingers found their way inside. "God, yes..."

Kate came in shuddering waves, she pulled Kathryn back up and pressed her against her naked body. It felt so good, so good to hold her, to feel her warmth, her familiarity.

She stared at Mark, again in disbelief and shook her head. She was back where she came from and something told her she never left in the first place. But whatever it was that just happened, it had changed her profoundly.

"It's all right, Mark." she said. "I don't need you any more."

All I need is me.

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